Archive for February, 2011

Pets Help People To Be Well

Tuesday, February 22nd, 2011

Can you name one medication that can lower blood pressure, boost our immune system, increase motivation, lessen the impact of depression, help with PTSD, decrease feelings of loneliness , elevate self-image, and help cultivate our ability to trust?   We can’t either, but these are just some of the benefits of healthy pet keeping.  Under most instances having a pet is a healthy and healing experience, pets can also help people to be more social.

Early contacts between our ancestors and canines benefited both species, and a dependent relationship evolved.  The animals first enjoyed food scraps and eventually accepted and enjoyed physical contact.  The humans benefited by having a warning when intruders were approaching.  Today it is estimated that 50 million households have pets.  Dogs and cats are most popular, but people also enjoy pet birds, fish, hamsters, rabbits, and more exotic pets like reptiles, hedgehogs and even tarantulas.

Pets can provide a significant source of emotional attachment that can be as important as the bonds formed between people, sometimes the bond with a pet can even be stronger than those with people, because bonds with many animals are perceived as unconditionally positive.  Pets can be our most personal and trustworthy companions because they are always there for us regardless of how we look or feel.  We can gain structure to the day by caring for our pets and we can demonstrate nurturance and love toward them, even when it seems like there is no one else available to receive or understand our love.

Of course, even with all the benefits of having a pet, it is not something to be entered into lightly.  Pets need to be cared for, and not only fed, they also require grooming and veterinary care.  Some people’s lifestyles are not suitable for some types of pets, so learning about how to keep a certain kind of pet healthy and happy is important to do before getting a pet.  A person who smokes tobacco may want to stop before bringing a pet home, and make that part of “pet proofing” the home.  Pets demand little from us, yet they are a source of immediate and consistent feedback, a benefit that is often hard to find in the social world.

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How to Deal with Emotional Pain

Tuesday, February 15th, 2011

When someone experiences a major life disruption, such as, the death of a loved one, a  relationship break up, serious illness or auto crash,  becomes a victim of crime or survives a natural disaster, it may not always be best to take medication immediately.  When emotional pain is alleviated with medication (or through alcohol or street drugs) the person’s motivation to make changes is lowered, and what can be learned by going through the process of managing emotional pain can be missed.

Of course, there are times when medication is useful and necessary, especially if a person is having suicidal thoughts that may accompany clinical depression.  This is a medical decision between the person and their doctor. This article is intended to give general information, and not to recommend treatment, which are decisions made by persons together with their healthcare provider.

When we experience a life disruption or crisis we need time to gain insight into what has gone wrong and work toward integration.  Emotional pain, while unpleasant serves a purpose, just as acute physical pain does in alerting us that something has gone wrong in our body.  Pain signals us to take action.  The purpose of emotional pain is to move us to learn new ways of coping.

There are some strategies that people in a state of crisis use to successfully deal with emotional pain.  These methods do not end the pain, which has value, but they offer us some relief from the emotional pains.

Sometimes we need to remove ourselves, so we can create a diversion, by planning a short trip, reading a book, talking with a friend, or getting some exercise.  Diversion allows us time away from the problem so that when we actively attend to it again, we may look at it in a “different light” or with “fresh eyes”.

Another strategy for coping with emotional pain is to take charge of those aspects of your life that you still have some ability to control.  Often a major life disruption can leave us feeling like life is spiraling away – totally out of control.  However, we can do some of our routines and self-care, and let the things that are uncontrollable run their course.

Finally, we can find someone who can show us empathy.  Reliving emotional pain by talking with a trusted friend or therapist is an effective strategy.  It is helpful when someone can say with caring and conviction that they understand and care about your pain.

Help is just a phone call away… 631.473.0405

http://clinicalhypnotism.com

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Posted in Handling crisis | 13 Comments »

Rebounding from Difficult Life Experiences

Monday, February 14th, 2011

Living our lives means experiencing major disruptions at certain points in time. Actually, we expect to have these types of experiences because it is part of being human. The normal life cycle has periods of predictable life disruption such as moving from childhood to the adolescence years, and all those changes that take place, and opportunities for exploring the world and relationships are presented. Adulthood responsibilities, parenting, middle aged reflection on life, retirement, and aging are other expected stages of life that may cause disruption for some. And, some people seem to sail through these without much difficulty.

Other periods of disruption are caused by unexpected events that can alter life activities in a major way. Events such as sudden significant illness, car crashes, the death of a loved one, divorce, becoming the victim of a crime, becoming unemployed, and financial upheaval as well as other changes, challenge our ability to cope, Any of these situations, can become pivotal depending on our ability to be resilient.

We all have the capacity to reorganize our lives after a disruption and to achieve order and meaningfulness following a period of disruption if we know how to activate our ability to be resilient. In fact, we may need life challenges in order to mature and grow emotionally. So, many of these life disruptions, are not necessarily negative things, if we grow and develop skills to use for future challenges.

Cultivating resilience depends on a number of things in addition to achieving closure on previous life experienced. People who are resilient have many of the following characteristics or resources:

  • A support system
  • A sense of hope and trust in the world.
  • An ability to tolerate pain and distressing emotions
  • a good self-image and self-respect
  • A capacity for self-reflection and insight
  • Varied interests and a sense of humor

All of us can learn methods to become more resilient. However, sometimes a lack of closure on life experiences in our past can prevent the activation of our learning new coping skills. By working with a qualified helping professional a person can gain closure to unresolved conflicts, and move forward through life with a sense of mastery and resilience.

http://clinicalhypnotism.com

Help is just a phone call away 631.473.0405

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Posted in Relationships | 4 Comments »