Posts Tagged ‘counseling’

Understanding Pet Loss

Tuesday, June 7th, 2011

by Cynthia Lindner, MS

The Private Sorrow of Goodbye

In a past entry I wrote about the benefits of having pets… health benefits and emotional benefits. This entry is about coping with and understanding the grief when a pet is lost or dies. Not everyone understands the enormity of the grief experienced by a pet keeper when their companion dies or is otherwise lost. A person grieving the loss often finds themselves lacking social support. The degree of attachment felt between a person and the pet who dies is a good indicator of how strong the grief reaction will be.

People experience the loss of a pet in a way that is similar to the stages of grief when we loose a close family member, and as with other types of grieving it is a process. The process usually begins with a feeling of numbness and disbelief. There can be times of deep sadness, depression and guilt. It is also possible that a person may feel anger directed at self or others about the loss. Perhaps at the veterinarian that didn’t do enough to save the pet, or toward other people for not understanding how deeply hurt one can feel. The decision to euthanize a pet is typically difficult because of strong feeling of guilt especially if the decision had to be based on finances. Even when money is not the issue there may be feelings of guilt for not doing enough to prevent the injury or illness that caused the decision to euthanize the pet.

Strong Bonds Equate to Strong Feelings of Grief

Grieving pet keepers often find themselves preoccupied with with memories and thoughts of the pet and a decreased ability to concentrate and focus on daily activities.
There can be individual differences in how we react to the loss of a pet. People who live alone or lack strong ties to others may find it more difficult to adjust to a pet’s death. People who feel that others understand their loss seem to process their grief more quickly.

When people die we have a set of societal or religious rituals to preform which inevitable helps us to move through the grieving process. Unfortunately, we have no rituals for morning the loss of a pet, in fact, it is somewhat discouraged. The reality is that a pet may be our closest companion or a surrogate child in the situation of a childless couple or “empty nesters”, and a source of unconditional love. Caring for an animal may be an important part of our daily routine, so when our pet dies the impact on our lives can be greater than when a person dies.

http://clinicalhypnotism.com

Advanced Hypnotherapy

Port Jefferson NY 11777

Phone: 631.473.0405

6 Tips Help You Reduce Weight and Keep It Off!

Wednesday, April 20th, 2011

Lasting weight loss demands that a transformation of your eating and exercise habits takes place, and using hypnosis can help people to look forward to eating and moving in a way that reflects a healthy lifestyle. Many other choices we make each day, such as how much time you spend sleeping or surfing the Internet, can also make a difference. The seven habits described in this article can help you move toward your goal weight.  Most target the common reasons people become overweight.

To get started, just do one thing differently. Choose the one that seems the most feasible for you, and work at sticking with it for a week. Once you’re doing it fairly consistently, add another one. Over time, you will realize that many of these behaviors can be interconnected.

1. Set small, specific, and reachable goals.

Perhaps you’d like to be the same size you were in high school or when you got married, but that would mean dropping more than 50 pounds. Don’t go there — not yet, at least. Set a more realistic goal of losing 5% to 10% of your weight, and give yourself plenty of time and some flexibility to reach that goal, keeping in mind that most people take at least six months to achieve that degree of weight loss.

2. Begin self-monitoring.

Writing down what you eat and how much you exercise can help you gain awareness of your behaviors and track your changes toward specific goals. To keep tabs on your what you are eating and how much activity you get, you can go low-tech (a pocket-size notebook with a pen) or high-tech (a smartphone app). There are even free sites on the internet to help with this. The idea is to create some mindfulness and identify areas you need to improve.

3. Eat a reasonable breakfast every morning.

Some people skip breakfast because they’re too rushed or they aren’t hungry. See if getting up 15 minutes earlier (which means going to bed earlier so you don’t loose sleep time) to make time for breakfast and practice putting down your utensil or sipping water, coffee, or tea between bites. Refrain from slamming down a fast food sandwich, or a bagel with a slab of cream cheese. Instead, have some whole grains, some protein and fruit.

4. Get active.

Work at adding activity to your day. Swim laps at a local pool, go dancing, play Frisbee, or take a brisk walk. Finding an activity that you really enjoy will make it easier to stick to a routine, and incorporating new types of activity can keep you challenged and less likely to become bored. Depending on your fitness level, you can start slow and gradually add more time and more vigorous activities

5. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep.

Research has shown that inadequate sleep can lead to weight gain. Most people need about eight hours of sleep a night, give or take a little. Some people may need more, some less. You’ll be able to tell if you’re getting enough sleep when you wake up feeling refreshed and ready to go, rather than groggy or tired.

6. Check and change your screen time.

Many people who struggle with weight complain that they don’t have enough time to exercise or to go grocery shopping and prepare healthy meals. But, most people do spend several hours watching TV or using their computer for entertainment. Keep track of your screen time for a week, then work at reducing the number of hours by a quarter or a third, and devote that time to your weight control efforts.


Hypnosis Can Help You To Become A Non-Smoker

Thursday, April 14th, 2011

Hypnotherapy is one technique that is a natural way to help you teach your subconscious what your conscious mind already knows– that using tobacco is harmful. Hypnotic intervention helps you to recognize the benefits of being a non-smoker, and return to the non-smoker you were born to be. You may learn new ways to cope with stress. During private sessions, your personal issues are addressed. We realize that people want to be smoke free for different reasons. For some, the reason for becoming a non-smoker is health concerns, while for others the concern is social acceptance. Some smokers are fed up with the rising cost of cigarettes, and others are angry about the apparent lies put forth by the tobacco industry itself. If you have tried other methods for quitting, but failed, private hypnotherapy may be right for you.

Hypnosis for Stop Smoking Video

Self-Help Tips

Here are some tips to use while becoming a non-smoker.

-Enjoy your meals without overeating; eat slowly and pause between bites.

-After dinner treat yourself to a mint or cup of herb tea with a touch of honey.

-To wakeup in the morning take a quick walk or do some other exercise.

-Take a deep breath and exhale slowly, the desire to smoke has passed.

Advanced Hypnotherapy, “Best of Long Island” 3 years in a row!

Call (631) 473-0405 to discuss how hypnosis may be helpful to you.

How to Deal with Emotional Pain

Tuesday, February 15th, 2011

When someone experiences a major life disruption, such as, the death of a loved one, a  relationship break up, serious illness or auto crash,  becomes a victim of crime or survives a natural disaster, it may not always be best to take medication immediately.  When emotional pain is alleviated with medication (or through alcohol or street drugs) the person’s motivation to make changes is lowered, and what can be learned by going through the process of managing emotional pain can be missed.

Of course, there are times when medication is useful and necessary, especially if a person is having suicidal thoughts that may accompany clinical depression.  This is a medical decision between the person and their doctor. This article is intended to give general information, and not to recommend treatment, which are decisions made by persons together with their healthcare provider.

When we experience a life disruption or crisis we need time to gain insight into what has gone wrong and work toward integration.  Emotional pain, while unpleasant serves a purpose, just as acute physical pain does in alerting us that something has gone wrong in our body.  Pain signals us to take action.  The purpose of emotional pain is to move us to learn new ways of coping.

There are some strategies that people in a state of crisis use to successfully deal with emotional pain.  These methods do not end the pain, which has value, but they offer us some relief from the emotional pains.

Sometimes we need to remove ourselves, so we can create a diversion, by planning a short trip, reading a book, talking with a friend, or getting some exercise.  Diversion allows us time away from the problem so that when we actively attend to it again, we may look at it in a “different light” or with “fresh eyes”.

Another strategy for coping with emotional pain is to take charge of those aspects of your life that you still have some ability to control.  Often a major life disruption can leave us feeling like life is spiraling away – totally out of control.  However, we can do some of our routines and self-care, and let the things that are uncontrollable run their course.

Finally, we can find someone who can show us empathy.  Reliving emotional pain by talking with a trusted friend or therapist is an effective strategy.  It is helpful when someone can say with caring and conviction that they understand and care about your pain.

Help is just a phone call away… 631.473.0405

http://clinicalhypnotism.com