Posts Tagged ‘hypnosis’

How to Make Positive Changes in Your Life

Thursday, May 5th, 2011

By, Cynthia Lindner, MS

clinicalhypnotism.com (631) 473-0405

Why do people seek out a Professional Counselor or Hypnotherapist for help?  There are many reasons a person may seek help. Some people would like to understand themselves better, while other may have a particular issue or self-defeating behaviors they want to address. Perhaps change is needed because the behavior is harming their health, interfering with their relationships with loved ones, or making it difficult to hold down a job.

healthyThe list of self-defeating behaviors is endless.  People want to stop smoking, and abusing other substances. They want to stop eating “junk food”, become a healthy weight  and exercise more.  They want to have fewer arguments and have more productive discussions with family, friends and coworkers.  Many desire to get their anger, anxiety, procrastination and controlling behavior transformed to calm optimism, so they find someone to help them make a positive change.

Making life changes is easy for some people and a daunting task for others.  Sometimes people have some success, but after a while they relapse back into their old patterns.  Perhaps they weren’t ready to make the change in the first place.

Research has identified six major stages in the change process, as discussed in Changing For Good by Prochaska, Norcros and DiClemente.

First, is the Precontemplation Stage, this is when other people such as family and professionals can see there is a problem the person with the problem fails to see it and feels no need to make a change.  They may agree to work on an issue because of external influence, or they want to quiet the nagging, but they are prone to returning to the behavior once the pressure is off.

Moving into the Contemplation Stage the troubled person is tired of feeling stuck in life with the self-defeating behavior, and can admit there is a problem, though they may not yet be willing to change it, still preferring the familiar.  It is during this stage that people begin to define their own goals.

There is a Preparation Stage– There is an awareness of the problem issue, a person makes plans and gets ready to do the work of making a change happen.  There is typically an increase in motivation, and a person may make the commitment to change public, such telling friends that a new diet will start in a week and asking them to not tempt them with baked goods, for example.

The Action Stage is the stage that is most visible to others.  Since changes are truly being made, a therapist can shift the focus to learning new strategies to maintain the changes over time.

Which brings us to the Maintenance Stage.  It is a time to make the changes that have taken place and make them part of everyday life.  You may think of the term lifestyle change taking place of the word diet.

There is the Termination Stage when the lifestyle change has become the natural behavior and there is no longer a battle with one’s self over having a smoke, a drink or overeating.  It feels like temptations are no longer a concern, and the person can live their life with out fear that a relapse will occur.

A skillful therapist can be a helpful partner through all of these stages by examining why change may be difficult and finding solutions to those obstacles to change, and help the person stay the course by working through the difficulties.  I would also like to mention that a person may not just move through these stages sequentially. A person may advance to Preparation, and the find themselves back at the Contemplation Stage.

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Posted in heath and wellness, Relationships, self-improvment | 6 Comments »

6 Tips Help You Reduce Weight and Keep It Off!

Wednesday, April 20th, 2011

Lasting weight loss demands that a transformation of your eating and exercise habits takes place, and using hypnosis can help people to look forward to eating and moving in a way that reflects a healthy lifestyle. Many other choices we make each day, such as how much time you spend sleeping or surfing the Internet, can also make a difference. The seven habits described in this article can help you move toward your goal weight.  Most target the common reasons people become overweight.

To get started, just do one thing differently. Choose the one that seems the most feasible for you, and work at sticking with it for a week. Once you’re doing it fairly consistently, add another one. Over time, you will realize that many of these behaviors can be interconnected.

1. Set small, specific, and reachable goals.

Perhaps you’d like to be the same size you were in high school or when you got married, but that would mean dropping more than 50 pounds. Don’t go there — not yet, at least. Set a more realistic goal of losing 5% to 10% of your weight, and give yourself plenty of time and some flexibility to reach that goal, keeping in mind that most people take at least six months to achieve that degree of weight loss.

2. Begin self-monitoring.

Writing down what you eat and how much you exercise can help you gain awareness of your behaviors and track your changes toward specific goals. To keep tabs on your what you are eating and how much activity you get, you can go low-tech (a pocket-size notebook with a pen) or high-tech (a smartphone app). There are even free sites on the internet to help with this. The idea is to create some mindfulness and identify areas you need to improve.

3. Eat a reasonable breakfast every morning.

Some people skip breakfast because they’re too rushed or they aren’t hungry. See if getting up 15 minutes earlier (which means going to bed earlier so you don’t loose sleep time) to make time for breakfast and practice putting down your utensil or sipping water, coffee, or tea between bites. Refrain from slamming down a fast food sandwich, or a bagel with a slab of cream cheese. Instead, have some whole grains, some protein and fruit.

4. Get active.

Work at adding activity to your day. Swim laps at a local pool, go dancing, play Frisbee, or take a brisk walk. Finding an activity that you really enjoy will make it easier to stick to a routine, and incorporating new types of activity can keep you challenged and less likely to become bored. Depending on your fitness level, you can start slow and gradually add more time and more vigorous activities

5. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep.

Research has shown that inadequate sleep can lead to weight gain. Most people need about eight hours of sleep a night, give or take a little. Some people may need more, some less. You’ll be able to tell if you’re getting enough sleep when you wake up feeling refreshed and ready to go, rather than groggy or tired.

6. Check and change your screen time.

Many people who struggle with weight complain that they don’t have enough time to exercise or to go grocery shopping and prepare healthy meals. But, most people do spend several hours watching TV or using their computer for entertainment. Keep track of your screen time for a week, then work at reducing the number of hours by a quarter or a third, and devote that time to your weight control efforts.


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Posted in heath and wellness, self-improvment | 8 Comments »

Hypnosis Can Help You To Become A Non-Smoker

Thursday, April 14th, 2011

Hypnotherapy is one technique that is a natural way to help you teach your subconscious what your conscious mind already knows– that using tobacco is harmful. Hypnotic intervention helps you to recognize the benefits of being a non-smoker, and return to the non-smoker you were born to be. You may learn new ways to cope with stress. During private sessions, your personal issues are addressed. We realize that people want to be smoke free for different reasons. For some, the reason for becoming a non-smoker is health concerns, while for others the concern is social acceptance. Some smokers are fed up with the rising cost of cigarettes, and others are angry about the apparent lies put forth by the tobacco industry itself. If you have tried other methods for quitting, but failed, private hypnotherapy may be right for you.

Hypnosis for Stop Smoking Video

Self-Help Tips

Here are some tips to use while becoming a non-smoker.

-Enjoy your meals without overeating; eat slowly and pause between bites.

-After dinner treat yourself to a mint or cup of herb tea with a touch of honey.

-To wakeup in the morning take a quick walk or do some other exercise.

-Take a deep breath and exhale slowly, the desire to smoke has passed.

Advanced Hypnotherapy, “Best of Long Island” 3 years in a row!

Call (631) 473-0405 to discuss how hypnosis may be helpful to you.

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Posted in heath and wellness, self-improvment | 4 Comments »

How to Deal with Emotional Pain

Tuesday, February 15th, 2011

When someone experiences a major life disruption, such as, the death of a loved one, a  relationship break up, serious illness or auto crash,  becomes a victim of crime or survives a natural disaster, it may not always be best to take medication immediately.  When emotional pain is alleviated with medication (or through alcohol or street drugs) the person’s motivation to make changes is lowered, and what can be learned by going through the process of managing emotional pain can be missed.

Of course, there are times when medication is useful and necessary, especially if a person is having suicidal thoughts that may accompany clinical depression.  This is a medical decision between the person and their doctor. This article is intended to give general information, and not to recommend treatment, which are decisions made by persons together with their healthcare provider.

When we experience a life disruption or crisis we need time to gain insight into what has gone wrong and work toward integration.  Emotional pain, while unpleasant serves a purpose, just as acute physical pain does in alerting us that something has gone wrong in our body.  Pain signals us to take action.  The purpose of emotional pain is to move us to learn new ways of coping.

There are some strategies that people in a state of crisis use to successfully deal with emotional pain.  These methods do not end the pain, which has value, but they offer us some relief from the emotional pains.

Sometimes we need to remove ourselves, so we can create a diversion, by planning a short trip, reading a book, talking with a friend, or getting some exercise.  Diversion allows us time away from the problem so that when we actively attend to it again, we may look at it in a “different light” or with “fresh eyes”.

Another strategy for coping with emotional pain is to take charge of those aspects of your life that you still have some ability to control.  Often a major life disruption can leave us feeling like life is spiraling away – totally out of control.  However, we can do some of our routines and self-care, and let the things that are uncontrollable run their course.

Finally, we can find someone who can show us empathy.  Reliving emotional pain by talking with a trusted friend or therapist is an effective strategy.  It is helpful when someone can say with caring and conviction that they understand and care about your pain.

Help is just a phone call away… 631.473.0405

http://clinicalhypnotism.com

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Posted in Handling crisis | 13 Comments »

Creating Positive Changes In 2011

Thursday, December 16th, 2010
When It Is Time For A Positive Change

Traditionally, we tend to find ourselves reflecting on our goals and accomplishments as we reflect on the end of one year, and look forward to the New Year. We also look at what areas we can improve upon.   We often resolve to change, make more of our future, and give up old habits.  We promise to construct some changes to make things better for ourselves. But, any time old patterns become uncomfortable can become the time we decide to create a positive change.  The focus may be on personal health issues such as weight control and stopping smoking, or other ways of making life better, like having the family together for dinner more than just a couple of nights a week, to not get so stressed out while driving, or to finally save some money just to be used for an emergency — a beginning to fiscal well-being.

These familiar resolutions are really transitions.  And, transitioning into a new lifestyle or behavior successfully requires some planning and self-reflection. When we choose to make such a transition, we need to give up our old definitions of the world, our old ways of doing things, and we find ourselves challenged by the process of “letting go”.  Endings are difficult for most people, even when we are unhappy with the way things used to be because we are more comfortable with what is familiar. The unknown can cause uneasy feelings.  Once we let go, however, we enter a period of feeling disconnected from the past but not yet connected to the present—this has been called the neutral zone.  This is when we can benefit from much self-reflection, and assess what we really want out of life.  It is also a time when we can reorient ourselves toward the future.

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Posted in self-improvment | 10 Comments »

Dealing With Controlling People

Saturday, December 4th, 2010

Difficulties frequently arise within relationships when one party becomes too controlling.  The person who is being controlled can feel lost and disengaged from their own decision making process.  And eventually, may not feel able to stand up for themselves and make decisions with out consulting the controller. In this type of extreme circumstance the controlling can be viewed as abusive behavior, and could even progress to violence.

Means of Control

Defining the other person: The person who controls comes up with ways to describe the other person which over time, become the reality of the relationship.  Example:  “Why is it always about you? You always have to be the center of attention.”

Diminishing: The controller diminishes the other person’s authentic self to create justification for stepping in and taking control.  Example:  “Why can’t you do anything right?  You are such a loser.”

Isolating: The controlling person loses their grip when the other person has social contacts that are a source of validation.  Example:  “I do not want you spending time with people from work. Your family doesn’t know what they are talking about; don’t talk to them about our business.”

Verbal abuse:  This type of controlling is abusive and includes name calling, blaming, withholding praise and encouragement, and offering judgment or criticism instead.  The verbal abuse may take the form of giving commands or making threats.

Individuals living with unaddressed verbal abuse may also be at risk for physical domestic violence, which is a crime.

Creating Some Positive Changes:

Many controlling people are surprised to learn that someone else thinks they are behaving in a controlling manner.  From the controller’s perspective they are just trying to get close to the other person by sharing their thoughts about how to do things, but they have little empathy for the person who is under their control.  When the controlled person resists the controller it leaves the person attempting to control feeling lost and abandoned.

This type of relationship can be filled with conflict and they often end with a bitter breakup.  With the help of a skilled therapist both the person who controls and the person who is controlled can gain a better understanding of why the controlling situation occurred.  And, explore the reasons for entering into this type of relationship while learning new ways of relating so that future relationships are healthy.

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Posted in Relationships | 2 Comments »